To new beginnings

They say that today is the next day for the rest of your life. It makes you value the present day more and makes you feel optimistic that it is never too late to start again. But sometimes there actually are days that mark the beginning of a new chapter of your life. Tomorrow will be one such day for me, and I am equally worried, confused, and excited.

The worry always comes from the same place. I want my future to be better than my past. I don’t want to carry over any baggage, and I want to do better this time around. But I am always afraid that I will repeat my old mistakes.

And I am confused, just like I always am when I am in a period of transition. Change is confusing. I may be happy about your decisions, and the very next moment something happens and I start to have doubts. I am confused cause you are stepping into unknown territories, and at some level, I am just winging it.

And yet I am excited because it is always exciting to get a new start, a clean slate. It means getting out of your comfort zone and trying hard again. Coming across new obstacles, and hopefully beating them and becoming stronger in the process.

It is a strange feeling, and I am sure it will pass soon, just like it always has. But it feels oddly zen to sometimes stop and just be in it.